Letting Go of a Painful Past

It can be difficult to let go of a painful past. We often carry around fears and obstacles from the past that prevent us from moving forward. In order to create a new future, we must first let go of the past.

Taking the First Step Forward

Letting go of the past is possible and can be done through creating new beliefs, forgiving yourself and others, and by taking action in the present moment. When we finally let go of our pain, we open ourselves up to an abundance of happiness and peace.

It is important to recognize that our life story is filled with chapters – they end and begin in a cycle. You have the power to write your story and end negative chapters in your life by writing new (and better) ones.

Let’s go over four steps that can help you start the process of letting go of your past:

1.      Start by creating new beliefs about yourself and your situation. Replace the negative thoughts and feelings with positive ones. Tell yourself that you are strong and capable, and that you can handle whatever comes your way. Validate yourself and your needs.

2.      Forgive yourself and others. Holding onto anger and resentment only hurts you more in the long run. Let go of the grudges and forgive those who have hurt you. This does not mean that you must forget what happened. It simply implies that you are choosing to move on from it all. Make a promise to yourself that the situation no longer controls you.

3.      Take action in the present moment. Do not let your fears or doubts keep you from living your life. Make a plan and take steps towards your goals. Do not wait for things to be perfect, because realistically they never will be. The only thing to do is to start moving in the right direction and trust the process. Ultimately, you will get to where you are meant to be.

4.      Reach out for help! Life is harder when you try to do it all on your own. There is no shame in seeking professional help or support from friends and family. Getting help is a sign of strength, not weakness.

Create New Beliefs, New Beginnings

Self-talk is an excellent method to begin creating new beliefs about yourself and your circumstances. Replace negative thoughts with positive ones and tell yourself that you are strong and capable. You can handle whatever comes your way. Take charge and reframe your lifestyle. Turn negative thoughts into positive actions.  

Crying and allowing space for negativity is also a process that can help you let go of pain and resentment, while avoiding toxic positivity. It involves crying, screaming, or pounding on your pillow to express the emotions that you are feeling. Allowing yourself the time and space to do this can be therapeutic. There is no shame in experiencing all of your emotions! Healing must come before starting fresh, and there is no timeline on that, either.

A Journal of Thoughts

Finally, journaling is another great way to work through your feelings about the past. Journaling can help you to release your emotions. It can also be a great way to track your progress as you ~literally~ write new chapters in your life story. 

It is okay to keep some beliefs about the past and still build new ones. That is how we show ourselves we have learned from the past and are ready to move on.

Remember:

·         You are strong and capable.

·         You can handle whatever comes your way.

·         Forgiveness is a choice.

·         Moving on is possible.

·         There is help available.

·         You are not alone in this journey.

Creating a Better Future

In order to envision and build a new future, you must first honor yourself and your history. As previously stated, carrying around anger, resentment, and guilt from the past only serves to restrict our ability to move forward in life. By seeking support, we show that we are willing to do whatever it takes to create new beliefs and ultimately a better future. So, get comfortable asking for help. Honor yourself and your past by moving forward with courage and determination – the past does not have to define you.

Acknowledge the past, work to make changes, and take the first step in moving forward.  There is “can’t” and then there is “won’t” - which side of the token will you fall on?

If you are struggling to let go of your past or still wondering how you may go about it, you have found the place to start. My Reframe Mastery Kickstarter ecourse is the first step to starting a new beginning for YOU.  You do not have to do it alone!